Pressure to Impress

It's more than subtle. The shoes that stick out, the ties that neatly adorn shirts, the cars that fly past...They present constant reminders to the many things we need to get going around us. It is a cycle that we wake up to everyday. The pressures that build on our relationships are even more pronounced. No matter the extent of our commitment, a silent but prodding pressure always makes demands. The pressure to be on top of our relationships is capable of producing headaches. Not just ordinary headaches, but nagging ones. It's not a funny situation. But it exists in the different forms and levels of relationships we have and wish to keep going on.

How does it all start? Constantly, we have models of what we want to have our relationships to look like. The effect: we are constantly on the look out for everything and anything that would help us attain our 'lofty heights'. While on the look-out, we become easily swayed and get entangled. We take on more than we can handle. Our erroneous 'one-size-fits-all' beliefs picked up while on the look-out, pursue us. The result: we are on the run, striving to be ahead but not realising that we are within reach. Remember the times, you had to buy the gift or give up that time because you felt you would loose your friend? Remember how you had to spend crazy because you didn't want to appear 'tight-fisted' in the midst of your cash crunch? Holy Mo! if only you had realised, at that time, that what you feared most would catch up with you. In hindsight, you would realise that all your super hero efforts went with the wind. They never really left a mark, and when the storms came, your friend hardly remembered the sacrifices.

Hey! I am not advocating that you leave out all the sacrifices. I mean what would become of friendships then. The crux of the matter: allow your self space. Do not give in to the pressure. The maddening pressure to impress that leaves you vulnerable and not very thoughtful. Always look at the big picture. That's the first step towards getting off the pressure train. Pause, ponder before acting. Answers to questions such as 'I'm I doing this because I want to?, I'm I in this because I believe it's better off? ...need to be given. In doing that you would discover that there would be reason to take things in stride. In taking things in stride, you would have a clear sense of judgement. The offshoot of the process, is that you would make lasting impressions in your relationships. Those impressions would be the holding fabric of every relationship when the world threatens to leave it thread-bare.

It's not too late. Step on the breaks. Get off and get going. You can do a lot more without the pressure. Don't you think so?